Hope is not a plan

Every time I read one of the recent spate of articles (or listen to a BBC report) talking about "knife culture" in the UK, I consider how I'd apparently be sent to jail for carrying around the very handy and durable Benchmade folder that I usually have on me. It's a great tool, and I use it all the time to break down excess boxes, cut rubber tubing, separate uncooperative attachments, and a bunch of other uses.

I notably have managed to go without stabbing anyone in the five or so years I've had it.

Over in the UK, politicians are in a race right now to overreact ever more prominently to the idea of a growing "knife culture," whether or not that idea is supported by actual facts. In an attempt to one-up Gordon Brown's remarks that anyone over 16 caught with an illegal knife should be prosecuted, Tory leader David Cameron has said that anyone convicted of carrying an illegal knife should go to jail (currently, about two thirds already do, by the way).

Mr Cameron said knife crime was a problem of "epidemic proportions" in the UK.

"We have to send a clear message that carrying a knife on our streets is completely inexcusable and unacceptable in a civilised society," he said.

Epidemic? From the same article:

In an attempt to play down fears of a knife crime "epidemic", Mr Straw pointed to a survey of accident and emergency departments by Cardiff University which suggested that the number of people needing treatment for injuries caused by serious violence was falling.

Oops. Well, despite that apparent fall in violence-caused injuries, Cameron is convinced that all society needs is a good dose of jailing to handle things. Now, there is the downside that you could potentially end up in jail because you needed a new steak knife, picked it up at the Tesco, and a cop stopped you on the way home. But Cameron has a solution to this one, too:

He urged police to exercise "common sense" by not prosecuting people carrying penknives for angling, or for bringing home kitchen or garden equipment from the shops.

"This is about kitchen knives stuffed down the front of tracksuits," he told The Sun.

Of course. After all, local government in the UK has an excellent recent record of not overreaching when given new powers. It's not as if they're spying on local families and staking out public parks to catch dog owners. You can completely rely on their common sense.

I think if I lived in the UK, I'd just mail order my kitchen knives from Amazon. Surely they won't arrest postal workers for knife violations.

BBC article